


If Only You Were Here

by PalestAzure



Category: Open Heart (Visual Novels)
Genre: Alternative Story, Angst and Tragedy, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-08
Updated: 2020-01-08
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:48:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22173580
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PalestAzure/pseuds/PalestAzure
Summary: Ethan’s strange behavior has Zyra concerned. But once Zyra learns of the identity of Patient X, everything comes into a whole new perspective.
Relationships: Dr. Ethan Ramsey/Main Character (Open Heart), Ethan Ramsey/Main Character (Open Heart)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 10





	If Only You Were Here

**Author's Note:**

> This was written after the release of chapter 6 and based on one of the Patient X theories.

Zyra was with Sienna at the nurse’s station. Zyra was reviewing some lab results for a patient who came in with shortness of breath. Sienna was reviewing a chart for one of her patients down the hall. 

“Take responsibility for your patient. Your cowardness almost cost your patient’s life. I swear if this patient is not alive when I get back, neither will be your job!” The sharpness of Ethan’s voice carried through the hallway.

“Is it me, or is Dr. Ramsey just becoming flat out mean lately?” Sienna whispered to Zyra.

Zyra agreed that there was some truth to Sienna’s comment. To her, Ethan appeared to be triggered more easily by the interns’ actions. His strict, angry tone did not have its usual edge of annoyed sentiment, but instead had some sort of brutalness that made him appear to have a short fuse more so than normal.

They saw Ethan walk towards their direction, his footsteps heavy. They both looked down at their papers, trying not to make eye contact. He passed them by without any acknowledgement. 

“I’m going to go see if he is OK,” Sienna pointed to the intern who was leaning against the wall outside in the hallway now trying to hold back tears. Zyra nodded. When Sienna left, Zyra turned to look in Ethan’s direction. He had already turned the corner. She went after him, following him around the corner until she caught up to his pace. 

“Dr. Ramsey?”

Ethan stopped, but only turned his head to peer over his shoulder. “I don’t have the time, Lewis.” His tone was short. 

“I just wanted to see if you were doing ok.”

“Leave your concern for your patients.” He walked away without another word, leaving her to watch him disappear down the hall. 

She knitted her eyebrows in concern. Their interactions were never like this. He wouldn’t even look at her. At that moment, she knew something was definitely wrong, and she could feel an uneasiness settling in her stomach.

* * *

The gang settled in a booth at Donahue’s. They had their laptops and books open, ready to tackle the mysterious case of Patient X. 

“If we can find any helpful information for Dr. Ramey’s team, we will definitely make it to the top of the list!” Landry exclaimed. 

“I still can’t believe that the interns get to help work on this case.” Elijah expressed. 

“Well, it is a test for us, so why not? And I don’t think any of the other interns will be able to do what we can.” Jackie gave a confident and wide smile. 

“I brought some treats for our late night study session.” Sienna pulled out a tupperware full of cookies. 

“Yes! Lifesaver!” Elijah began helping himself. 

“We should start by finding a connection between these symptoms.” Landry eagerly suggested. 

Zyra heard their conversation, but she wasn’t listening. Her mind was elsewhere as she stared straight through the pages of a reference book in front of her. The group noticed how quiet she was. 

“Zyra?” Jackie nudged her in the arm. 

“Yes. We should do that. Right.” Zyra pretended to add to the conversation. 

The door to the bar opened. Zyra lifted her eyes from her book and noticed Ethan walking in towards the bar where Reggie stood. He greeted Reggie as he took a seat. Reggie instinctively handed Ethan a drink, as they both smiled and began talking with each other. When Reggie went to help another customer, Zyra perked up in her seat. 

“I’ll be right back.” Zyra left the booth and took a seat near Ethan. 

“Good evening, Dr. Ramsey.”

“You stalking me now, Rookie?” He took a sip of his drink without looking in her direction, not even from the corner of his eye. 

“I wanted to talk about today.”

“There’s nothing to talk about.” He stood up and left, leaving behind a half drunken whiskey neat and a bewildered Zyra.

“Something’s not right.” 

Zyra turned her attention to Reggie. “I feel the same way.”

“Go after him.”

“He doesn’t want to talk to me. I should give him his space.”

“Trust me.” Reggie placed his hand on top of hers. “Go.” 

Zyra saw a similar concern in Reggie’s eyes. A concern that matched her own. She nodded to him and then bolted out the door. She looked to her left, then her right and saw Ethan already about to cross at the corner of the road. 

She ran towards his direction, calling his name. “Dr. Ramsey, wait!” This time, he turned around, watching her running to him. She stopped before him, catching her breath. “You’re just going to leave like that? I mean, there’s a perfectly good whiskey being wasted right now.” She tried to flash him a friendly smile. 

Ethan breathed out heavily as he closed his eyes. “Then you can have it. Good night, Rookie.” He began to turn away, but Zyra grasped his arm and positioned herself in front of him, blocking his escape.

“No. You can’t do that. You can’t just walk away from me like this.”

“How entitled you sound.” His eyes narrowed at her, a distinct frown formed across his lips. 

“I just… I care about you.” She admitted softly. 

“Rookie.” He swallowed hard, his voice nearly cracking. The harshness in his face began to dissolve. “I can’t do this right now, please. Just go.” He tugged his arm away from her grasp, and began walking away.

* * *

Zyra was waiting for the elevator on the third floor. She was annoyed by the events from the day prior and was thinking how stubborn Ethan was being. She was taking out her frustrations on the poor elevator button, impatiently pressing it multiple times. “Come on. Hurry up.” She muttered under her breath. 

Finally, a ding alerted its arrival. The doors opened to reveal Ethan standing alone on the inside. Zyra’s eyes immediately darted to the floor. For a split second, she stood there, hesitant to enter. She quietly drew in a deep breath, entered the elevator, and pressed the button for the eighth floor. She stood on the opposite side, away from Ethan. 

Ethan had observed her every move. Once the doors closed, he finally broke the silence. “I’m sorry for how I spoke to you yesterday.” 

It took a moment for Ethan’s words to register. “It’s all right.”

“No, it’s not. You’re the last person I would ever want to hurt.”

Zyra met his gaze. It was a sharp contrast to how he looked at her before. Now gentle but regretful.

“Are you OK? I’ve been worried about you? Reggie, too.” She reached out and lightly grabbed his hand. 

“Everything is fine.” He smiled. “Thank you for your concern.”

The elevator stopped at the seventh floor. “You should go back to work, Rookie. Maybe we could talk later.” He squeezed her hand affectionately before pulling away. 

As Ethan began to walk out, he staggered and fell against the door frame of the elevator. Zyra quickly rushed to Ethan’s side. 

“Dr. Ramsey!”

“I’m fine. I’m just a bit lightheaded. I forgot to eat something this morning. It’s my fault.” His body was slightly trembling. 

“Should I get someone?”

“No. That’s not necessary. I just need to get to my office.”

“But…” 

“Please, Rookie.”

Zyra held onto Ethan’s arm, trying to help balance him as they made his way down the hallway to his office. Ethan pulled his keys from his pocket, but couldn’t match the key to the lock. They eventually fell, making a slight clink as they made contact with the floor. Ethan groaned in frustration.

“It’s OK. I can help you.” Zyra picked up the keys and opened the door. She helped him sit down in one of the chairs sitting in front of his desk. 

“There’s a bottle of medicine in the top drawer…”

Zyra raced to his desk, looking for the bottle. She found it in the back of the drawer, almost hidden from plain sight. There was no label. Her hands were shaking as she tried to open it. 

“How many?

“Two. And that water bottle over there.” He motioned with his head, pointing to the far edge of his desk. 

Ethan downed the pills and sat back in the chair, waiting for the medicine to kick in. Zyra placed the pill bottle on the desk. She looked at him with a combination of confusion and concern in her eyes. Ethan leaned forward, taking her hands in his still trembling ones. 

“I’m sorry that you had to see this. I never wanted to involve you. Not like this.”

“Dr. Ramsey… Ethan…” her voice cracked as his name fell from her lips. “This is definitely not the result of some low-blood sugar, is it?”

He sighed. “This whole thing with Patient X. My team. The interns. They’re all trying to find a diagnosis, but… it’s all for me.”

“What?” She dropped to her knees before him. Their hands were still entwined as they rested against Ethan’s thighs. 

“I’m Patient X.” He revealed in a hush tone. “The medication is to temporarily help with the symptoms, but…”

“Ethan…”

“Please keep this a secret. The anonymity of this case is important, and I can’t have anyone know of my identity.”

“Of course.” As she looked at him, she witnessed a raw vulnerability idling in the expression on his face. 

“I…I feel alone in all of this most of the time.” 

“I’m here.” She cupped the sides of his face. Tears began to shimmer in his eyes. 

“I’m angry. But most of all, I’m scared, Zyra.” 

His head slumped down to her shoulder. She drew her arms around him, holding his head against her. She tenderly ran her fingers through his hair. Then she heard a great sob escape him. She could feel his tears soak into the shirt of her scrubs. His hands tightly gripped her back as if she were a form of life support he was clinging on to. 

The sounds of his sobs were gut-wrenching. She felt her mouth become dry. Her throat burned as she swallowed, trying to suppress her own need to cry. Her eyes swelled up in tears for the man she now held so protectively in her arms. 

“You have one of the most revered diagnostic teams in the world working on your case.” She whispered. “And you have all us interns, as well.” Surprisingly, she heard him softly chuckle.

“You interns. That’s comforting.” He sat back up, his hands still lingering on her frame. “Though I’m thankful you’re here in the program, Rookie.”

Zyra reached up and brushed away some loose strands of his hair that had fallen along his forehead and wiped some of the tear stains under his eyes with her fingers. “Someone needs to hold the title of being the biggest pain in your ass.” She smiled, trying to continue to lighten the tone. 

He pulled her into a hug. “That indeed you are. Thank you.”

* * *

“7” was the only number lit up among the columns of buttons in the elevator. When exiting, she made her way down the rows of offices until she found the exact one she was looking for. 

She stopped in front of the office door, and placed her hand on the door knob. It was locked. To the right of the door was a blank nameplate. She ran her fingers along it, pretending to write out his name as she had remembered it to be when it once read “Dr. Ethan Ramsey, Director of Diagnostics.”

She had run into him at the bar that night. They walked out together, him offering to give her a ride home. 

“I’m OK. I think I’m going to stick around here a little bit longer,” she replied. 

She watched as he pulled away, driving down the road and disappearing into the night. Had she had known that would be the last time she saw him. Had she had known he would have gone into cardiac arrest that very night. Had she had known, she would have done that night differently with him. Reached out for his hand as they walked together. Told him that she loved him. Accepted his offer. _His offer._

If she had only accepted his offer, she believed she would have been there when it happened. Perhaps he wouldn’t have been alone. Perhaps she could have helped him. Saved him. Perhaps.

While tracing his name over and over, she recalled the last words she ever said to him. 

“I still have many years to impress you. You’re not done yet.” She gently smiled. 

She remembered how his face softened, his eyes lingering on hers. He then tenderly kissed her cheek and gave her a half smile as he waved his goodbye. He was eerily quiet before entering his car and finally leaving. She wondered if he somehow knew how that night would end. If he had known he would never see the morning again, or advocate for another patient, or take Jenner on another walk, or listen to another concerto, or share another secret with only her. 

Her eyes flooded with tears as they fell along her cheeks, leaving tracks of evidence of her regret, sorrow, and loss. She placed her hand on the door as if she could feel a part of him still lingering there. Hoping that maybe if she knocked, she would hear him say “come in” and he would be sitting behind his desk, dressed impeccably. His head would lift up with his radiant blue eyes greeting her from behind his eyeglasses. 

Her pager went off, its humming vibration disrupting her memories. She looked at her pager, recognizing a call from the diagnostics team. She had only been a member of the team for six months, but his memory and her love for him drove her motivation, her ambition to continue his work and come into her own. Her final words to him gave her a new meaning in her life. She knew he would be proud of the path she had chosen because she knew that he had loved her too. 

_You’re not done yet._


End file.
